Jarrett Jack: Sons of Portland! I am Jarrett Jack.
Steve Blake: But Jarrett Jack is over six feet tall!
Jarrett Jack: Yes, I've heard. 6'3". Scores points by the hundreds. And if HE were here, he'd consume the Clippers with fireballs from his eyes, and bolts of lightning from his arse.
[Blazers laugh]
Jarrett Jack: I AM Jarrett Jack! And I see a whole team of my Blazers, here, in defiance of the Western Conference powers. You've come to play as free men, and free men you are. But what will you do with that freedom? Will you make the playoffs?
James Jones: Against the Nuggets, Warriors and Rockets? No, we'll run, and we'll live.
Jarrett Jack: Aye, try and you may lose, run, and you'll live ... at least a while. And then dying in your beds, many years from now, would you be willin' to trade ALL the days, from this day to that, for one chance, just one chance, to come back here and tell the West that they may take our rebounds, but they'll never take ... OUR PLAYOFFS!!!!!
[Blazers cheer]
Kobe Bryant's 'Way of the Intercepting Fist'
Not only will Kobe Bryant beat you down on the basketball court, he'll also kick your ass off of it. Yes, according to the embedded NBA correspondent, Elie Seckbach, Kobe trains in Bruce Lee's martial art, Jeet Kune Do -- literal translation, "way of the intercepting fist" -- in order to take his game to the next level.
Man, I can’t wait to watch Kobe do this to Raja Bell or Bruce Bowen in the playoffs.
(Hat-tip to Larry Brown Sports, Seattle PI)
'Genius' continues: Kobe Bryant as George Washington Carver
I realize this is the second Mamba video of the day, and that the official Kobe Bryant Blog Day isn’t scheduled until March, but ... well, I couldn’t resist. Kobe with a mustache makes me happy.
This is the fourth in a series of five "Genius" commercials. In Kobe's first three spots we've seen him personate Leonardo da Vinci, Wolfgang Amadeus Mozart and Albert Einstein.
Any guess what final "genius" Kobe will play? Shakespeare? Darwin? Phil Jackson?
The Indiana Pacers are a public relations nightmare
Over the course of three months, the Pacers' PR team has had to deal with a point guard who dodges bullets ('Pacer's night out ends in shooting'); another guard was linked to a rape incident ('Sex assault reported at home of Pacers' Marquis Daniels'); and now, a forward who houses fugitives ('Cops nab murder suspect at home of Pacers' Williams'). And as SLAMonline points out, this junk all went down AFTER they got rid of "troublemakers" Ron Artest and Stephen Jackson. Jeesh. How does Larry Bird even sleep at night?
So, I figured since the Pacers can't avoid making front-page news, I could just write a few of their headlines in advance. You know, save the newspaper editors the hassle. They'll probably be true by Monday morning, anyway.
* Eye disease linked to Pacers’ David Harrison
* Pacers’ Jermaine O’Neal kills 17,000
* Mexico says drug traffickers, Pacers’ Travis Diener behind bomb
* Pacers’ Jeff Foster indicted on animal cruelty, hamster fighting charges
* Earthquake: Pacers’ Mike Dunleavy Jr. could be to blame
* Caught pants-down in house's chimney, Pacers’ Troy Murphy claims he was stargazing
* Boomer arrested on sex charges
* Some scholars, reassessing Cold War, blame Pacers’ Danny Granger
* Enraged Pacers’ GM injures team with ax
Feel free to leave your inevitable Pacers' headlines below. Some of you are quite creative.
An awkward four minutes with Kyle Korver
KUTV news anchor Shauna Lake went one-on-one with Utah Jazz shooting guard Kyle Korver last week. It is without doubt one of the most awkward interviews I have ever seen. I loved it!(Note: This is where I'd normally embed the video, but KUTV -- Utah's source for breaking news, weather and sports! -- has included some weird script code in the video that won't allow me to post it here. Computers, man. I give ‘em three more years. Tops. Anyway, click here to watch the interview.)
Lake grills Korver on anything and everything. She asks him about moving to Salt Lake City, his religious ties, his favorite music (Linkin Park, Pearl Jam, Incubus), his three brothers, and whether he's comfortable being considered a sex symbol. (Nope.) Korver clutches a pillow to his chest throughtout the interview.
And then Lake's four-year-old son shows up to hand Korver a squished peanut butter and jelly sandwich from her purse. Seriously. It's wild.
Just watch it, if only for the ridiculously awkward banter between Lake and another host before and after the interview. Cable television is the best.
(Thanks to the My Utah Jazz blog for the tip.)
Behind the boxscore, where the Jazz have the Pistons' number
The best game of the night. Detroit's first half defense was outstanding, scoring 53 points in Utah in a low-possession game is pretty impressive, but holding the Jazz to 42 points was quite the accomplishment.
Utah made what had to be termed an "expected" second-half run, and it was a little disappointing to see the Pistons unable to at least come close to matching Utah's energy solutions (not sure where that phrase popped up, because it's not as if ad execs can get to me, by Mennen). The Jazz turned up the heat defensively, and got out in the fast break for easy scores as the Pistons weren't talking in transition.�
Deron Williams was nice, finding teammates on the baseline for quick scores, while matching and eventually exceeding Chauncey Billups' physical play. He didn't shoot well, 4-12 from the floor, but managed 14 assists to two turnovers. Rasheed Wallace had a crummy shooting game until the fourth quarter, but his half-court defense in the first half was huge. In the second, however, he and Antonio McDyess and Jason Maxiell were left pointing at the Jazz wing or big that had beaten one of them down court for the flush.�
Paul Millsap, of all people, was the go-to guy for the Jazz down stretch, scoring 16 points in a 13-minute run on a series of post-ups, jumpers (!), trips to the line, and dunks off of Williams feeds. 19 points in 20 minutes total for Millsap, while Mehmet Okur (in his favorite little spot on the left elbow extended) took over offensively in the final minutes.
36 fourth quarter points for the Jazz. Against the Pistons. Against an interested Pistons team. Nice. �
On another front: look at Carlos Boozer. How does that shot even make it to the rim?
I'm not going to say that Minnesota had a chance to win this one, but they did kind of give up on this game in the second quarter. The Wolves just kept fouling people, reaching, giving up on plays, refusing to move its feet, and sending a Raptors team full of jump shooters to the line.�
Toronto's 107 points may seem like a solid amount, but in a low-possession (85 of ‘em) game, this was a bit of a scoring spree. The Raptors threw in a pro-rated 125.9 points per hundred possessions; and, for comparison's sake, the Phoenix Suns have the best mark in the league with 114.9 points per hundred possessions.
Chris Bosh was great (28 points on 17 shots), while the Toronto point guard tandem of Jose Calderon and T.J. Ford combined for 22 points, ten assists, and one (!) turnover in 48 minutes. Rashad McCants led the Timberwolves with four fouls.�
As you read this, the Orlando Magic (after having probably spent the night in Philadelphia, and with two days off before playing New York at MSG) are either flying back to Florida, already ensconced at home in Florida, or on its way toward NYC. I'm not sure of the team's travel plans. I called up LaGuardia last night to ask if they'd been, and I quote, "Redick'ed yet?", but nobody wanted to take me seriously. Their loss. �
No, your loss. Because I'm in it to inform you, the reader.
Either way, wherever the team is, you can be sure coach Stan Van Gundy is muttering. �
The Magic came out completely unprepared to compete against a 76ers team that they clearly thought was beneath them, and allowed the Sixer shooters to throw in 33 first quarter points. By the time Orlando started caring defensively, the shots stopped falling. Orlando was +7 in the second half, but all that did was make this blowout appear closer than it was. �
This game should have been alot more entertaining, it was a pretty cool run, but both these teams have tons of holes, so it wasn't the best 48-minutes of basketball you've ever seen.
Unsurprisingly, Mike Bibby had his best game as a Hawk against the Kings. He better have: you play with a team for almost six and a half years, get traded, and then play your former team twice in a week? Better bring it, yo. 24 points on just 13 shots, five rebounds, 12 assists to just one turnover for Bibby. �
Josh Childress was the man in the second half for Atlanta, he had 25 off the bench on just ten shots. Some team is going to steal him from the Hawks this summer, pundits will claim that the team overpaid, and they'll be way the hell off. This guy is a stud.
Sacramento got its house in order once they stopped turning the ball over, and the team at least knows what to do defensively (in that empty Atlanta gym, each of Reggie Theus' defensive instructions could be heard bouncing off the walls), but the Kings need to keep it together for 48 minutes just to compete against more talented teams. They haven't been up to that task, recently.�
Also, a hint: every few weeks, until something pops up, keep entering "Reggie Theus hunting" into the search bar over at YouTube. Trust me.
I've got 30 teams to watch, and yet it felt as if the Celtics were playing their first game at home since Boxing Day. It's only been two weeks since the team's last homer, so I can't imagine what it's felt like for Boston fans.�
The Celtics did well not to overplay defensively, Delonte West snuck in some baskets in half-court and transition, but LeBron James missed 17 of 24 shots, and only managed 26 total points in spite of taking in 15 free throws. �
Wally Szczerbiak (3-13 on Wednesday, 12-41 as a Cav, 29.3 percent) continues to throw up bricks from the baseline, and Ben "we need someone to guard KG" Wallace didn't really seem to matter as Garnett went for 18 points on 14 shots in 33 minutes, with 11 rebounds, five assists, four steals, and one turnover. �
Any Knick win, even a blowout win, fails to surprise me: this team has a ton of talent. And I don't mean, "Eddy Curry's gonna rise up!"-talent. I mean actually efficient, aggressive talent that should result in more wins. �
David Lee, Jamal Crawford (when penetrating), Nate Robinson, Fred Jones (!); even Quentin Richardson, when his shot is on, gives the team a version of whatever the hell they thought Jared Jeffries was going to be for them. These guys can play. Too bad Isiah Thomas can't coach.
David Lee (four points, 14 rebounds, three assists, no turnovers, two steals, one block in 21 minutes) was a ridiculous +37 on the night. Charlotte lost Jason Richardson in the second quarter after the high-flying wing was smacked in the eye.�
The Hornets don't like to run much, so 120 points for them is something like 130 points for the Warriors and Suns, but this accomplishment is sort of mitigated by the fact that the Phoenix Suns don't play defense anymore.�
They used to, whether people want to believe it or not. Phoenix was consistently smack dab in the middle of the points allowed per possession stats. The Suns weren't a good defensive team, but they were mediocre; and, when matched with an offense that no team could touch, this was enough to build a championship contender.
Now they're lousy: still stuck at 15th in the NBA at defensive efficiency, but bound to head down after this one. Anyone who wants to pile dirt on the Suns is a fool, I believe, because we have to wait until May to make the final call. That said, things aren't really working out so far. �
Chris Paul (25 points, 15 assists, six rebounds, three steals, just one turnover) is awesome, David West (27 points) was potent, and Jannero Pargo (22 points in about 23 seconds) had one of those Jannero Pargo-type games he seems to have every two weeks.�
Denver shot 67 percent in this game. This pro basketball game, against an NBA team. They shot 67 percent.�
A pretty ridiculous outing, even when the team was averaging two makes for every three tries, it never felt as if Denver was on fire. You didn't get the feeling that they could make a 23-footer with one eye shut; and, then again, it didn't seem as if Seattle (pathetic as it was defensively) was just handing the Nuggets lay-ups.
Denver just ran its offense, moved the ball (35 assists), and got into the lane long enough for a batch of unknowing SuperSonic youngsters to collapse in a heap. Look at this boxscore: rookie Taurean Green and Linas Kleiza tied for the worst shooting percentage on the Nuggets, and they made half their shots.
Portland 82, Los Angeles Clippers 80
Credit the Clippers for getting back into this one, because the first half of this game was some of the worst offensive basketball I've seen in a while (29 points for L.A.), and I'm a few days removed from watching the Spurs "drop" five points in a quarter.
Portland needed a good scoring game from Jarrett Jack (21 points on 13 shots) to "hold on," because Steve Blake (zero points in almost 19 minutes) was giving them nothing. Also, someone needs to tell LaMarcus Aldridge (nine points on nine shots, six rebounds in almost 33 minutes) that he "needs to stop doing that."
Chicago 113, Indiana 107
The thing about Indiana's drive-and-kick offense is that, eventually, the drivers won't want to drive anymore, and the kick will end up in the hands of a shooter who rarely has the legs or accuracy to squirrel away a win based off of 25-footers alone.
Chicago hung in there, benched its mopey Iowan in the third quarter, held on to the ball, and dominated the paint offensively. Forwards Drew Gooden and Tyrus Thomas combined for a great game; and while newcomer Larry Hughes hit for 29 points on 19 shots, I'm not going to read too much into it because the overwhelming bulk of his attempts were pretty lousy shots, and he seemed lucky to hit a third of them.
Andres Nocioni was Chicago's go-to guy as they pulled away in the fourth, and Joakim Noah righted his own personal ship with 11 points, seven boards, two steals and a block in 26 minutes.
The 10-man rotation, starring the CEO who beat Michael Jordan
A look around the league and the web that covers it. It's also important to note that the rotation order and starting nods aren't always listed in order of importance. That's for you, dear reader, to figure out.
C: FanNation. Apparently, CEO John Rogers Jr. once beat a post-Wiz era Jordan in a game of one-on-one.
PF: The Onion, via YAY. Gerald Green's cupcake has been inducted into the Cupcake Hall of Fame.
SF: KnickerBlogger. They don't call Knicks forward David Lee "Mr. Good Things" for nothing.
SG: Mavs Moneyball. An early look at the impact of Shaquille O'neal and Jason Kidd.
PG: Los Angeles Times. Is the Lakers’ bench the best in the West?
6th: Odenized. Quentin Richardson. Words. Short.
7th: Dallas Morning News. Uh-oh. Kidd’s on the cover of this week's SI. Better stretch those hamstrings, Jason.
8th: The Blowtorch. Oh where, oh where has the Suns' three-point shooting gone?
9th: Detroit Bad Boys. Live near Detroit? Then get your 2nd annual Need4Sheed/DBB Blogfest game tickets.
10th: X's & O's. "If the Suns have any hope to win in the playoffs then Steve Nash is going to have to pick up his defense."
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